It Finally Feels Okay

I should wrote this long time ago. This post is kinda important, cause I need to tell you that it finally feels okay. 

It was the usual day. 

The sun is up, nice and not too bright. 

I dress normal. I was going to school. 

You know, I was driving slow, passing the neighborhood.

And suddenly, the thoughts of you striking up at my face. 

I was thinking of you, but not completely who you are, or at least the person I thought you were. 

I feel like I'm losing you and I'm aware that I am! But I always thought that you'd come back to me eventually, like you always did. 

Guess that morning I realize that I was wrong. 

You are clearly not coming back. 

My inner peace would say that I have to get your focus back on me.

Surprise, I wasn't thinking that way. 

More surprise, I think that I can finally let you go. 

That I've been chasing my tail all this time. 

You're not who I thought you were anymore. 

I've lost you since I left you. 

I've changed you since I broke you. 

And that's not your fault. It's one hundred percent mine. 

More and more surprise, I realize that I can do nothing about it. 

I've tried to put your pieces back together but you are glasses. 

You can't be perfect just like before. 

I'm expecting ghost to come knocking at my door. 

More and more and more surprise, it feels fine. 

I accept that you're deadly mad at me. 

I accept that I'm not going to be your alley any years from now. 

I accept that you don't want me to be the part of anything in your life. 

I accept your decisions. I do. 

Now, let me admit that you are the man who keeps his word. 

I forget a lot of things these days, but I'm never gonna forget the day when you said that you're gonna disappear from my life if we ever broke up for the same reason as the first one. You said you gave us one more chance and you put every pulse, every blood stream, every atom in your body to work that relationship with me. But in the end, you get fucked up, by me. 

Unluckily, we seperate for the same reason. You keep your word, you still do. 

You're near, but you're not here. 

I can see you, but I can't reach you. 

You are disappear. 

I'm sorry. Never enough for me to say it through these post on my blog. 

I just want you to know that it finally feels okay to let you go. 

You were my past. You made me who I am today. 

I'm thankful for that, every day in my life. Cause if it wasn't you, I might be a different version of me right now. And this post wouldn't even exist. 

So,

I pray that you'll have a great journey ahead of you, when everything finally falls into line.

Perhaps later on, you will cross my path or I cross yours, 

and we finally start over again, 

as strangers.
And I promise, no more baes.