It's like anxiety or panic attack or just stress maybe. I wanted so many things. I admitted that. It's not like I want to shopping or gadgets or night out drunk. I want to be safe. This post is private, really. It's what pops in my head and my head is quite busy right now. Messy. So, back to the topic, I want so many things but I want it now. I know it's not ideal, and I've come so far and way ahead of some people but I still not satisfied, I mean I am worried. I am not in the safe zone. Not my comfort zone. I know I can't have it all in a very very short time. But, still, I want to learn and earn so bad. See, I need to learn how to manage and stay calm and be prepared for anything else. I need to calm my self down. Well, February wasn't always like this. February was great but some of it I worried. I joined the ALB test this month tho. It was fun. But, things are messy, I am not sure if it's just me, in my head, or is it real.

I need to learn to be patient right. I need not to compare right. I need to be more grateful right. I need to hang tighter. I need sugar.