I Have Trust Issue

I also feel desire to be angry, simple things made me emotional easily so I yelled to people around, most of the time. And, I think I have a trust issue too. I started to think that people are more likely tell bullshits and lies rather than tell the truth. Anything they said, I calculated it and wonder if its lies or truth. What makes me more surprise is that I do that to people I trust the most and people I spent so much time with.

To be honest, I'm not quite understand what is happening. 

Maybe I just need more time of being alone, since I had so many homework and most of them in groups, I need more time to think.

Maybe I spent too much time doing something wasted. Maybe I have to be more focus of my life. 

I'm just guessing. 

Or this is a part of growing up. If that's really the reason, probably I have a chance to be scared. Because I don't wanna be an emotional-grown-ups-who-angry-all-the-time and nobody wants to get close to me. Getting older is scare me enough, and I hope I don't have to turned into a monster. 

Sometimes when I'm alone, I think I probably need psychologist or something to help me out. So, I can control my emotion and my wild thoughts about people. It's like I'm going crazy in a minute. 

This is far away from being comfortable. 

I hate it. Bring my innocent-me back. Please.